How I Became Interested In Spanking

It's been a long time since I got spanked. I was 15 the last time my dad yanked my pants and underwear down and took me across his knee. I almost got it when I was 18, but somehow managed to talk my way out of it. My pants were down and I was bent over for my dad's belt, but then he just told me to go to my room. 

Anyway, my fascination with spanking began at puberty. I didn't like being spanked. In fact, I was terrified by the thought. But I would play through different scenarios in which I'd be spanked by either my dad, a teacher, a friend's dad or even a stranger. In my mind, it would happen at home, at school, someone else's home, in public. But all the while, I had this dread of it actually happening. I would make a resolution every year that I would not get spanked. And yet I would spank myself. When my parents were gone I would go into parts of the house that I'd been spanked in, pull my pants and underwear down and experiment with implements to see what could most closely simulate the feeling of a real spanking. 

Very few people knew that I got spanked. Of course, our neighbors did. I was not quiet about it. We moved around a lot and sometimes we lived in states where corporal punishment was allowed. I got spanked in kindergarten. Bare butt with a ruler in front of the class. I got spanked in first grade. That was on my jeans with a strap by the principal in his office. I got spanked twice in fifth grade, the first time with a paddle over my jeans and second time on my bare butt over the principal's knee with his hand. When you got spanked in school, everyone knew. 

The first time I ever got spanked bare was when I was 10. It was by my dad and it was also the first time I ever got the belt. That was, at the time, the worst experience of my life. I had been spanked before. The time in kindergarten was embarrassing and it hurt, but it wasn't awful. And a lot of kids got spanked like that. The time in first grade was the hardest I'd been spanked. Until, that is, when my dad gave me the belt at 10. Now I knew what a spanking really was like, and I became scared to death of getting another. The real catalyst was getting my butt spanked bare over the principal's knee. That was at the urging of my father, who was present when it took place. My dad and an administrative assistant were witnesses. I never got spanked in school again, but I thought about. I still do. 

I got spanked a few times by my dad after that time with the belt when I was 10. He only gave me the belt one other time, when I was 14. I also became fascinated shortly thereafter. The other times he took me over his knee and spanked me with his hand. He spanked very hard and very fast, so it was not like he was going easy on me. Those were terrible, too. The worst was when I was 15 and my dad found out I'd been drinking. He gave me the spanking of all spankings with his hand and a ping pong paddle. Do 15 year old boys scream when they get spanked? This one did. 

Anyway, we talked about the one I dodged when I was 18. I spent the next three years fearing that I would still get spanked. 

I kind of forgot about the whole spanking thing. I got married and had kids. Two girls. They've never gotten spanked. But now I've found myself slipping back into this fascination with spanking again. I never involve my daughters in these fantasies, god no. It's always me. And it's almost always me when I was younger. Now I'm actually considering going to a mentor to fulfill the fantasy of being spanked again. I know that it would be different. One, I'm not scared of it anymore. So it's something I'm just toying with. And it isn't anything I can talk to anyone about. My wife would think I'm nuts. So here I am, writing it here.

To anyone who's reading, thank you for letting me share my story with you.